Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Come on. Fast.

Now that in the recent past we have seen Mamata Bannerjee and Anna Hazare fast to get things done (good or bad, irrelevant...), I think Indian think tanks are empty. The ones sitting in the upper, lower, middle, inner and outer houses of the parliaments are simply sucked into the demands of the fast-ers. Again, good or bad is irrelevant.

So, I'm guessing a few other people will be waiting to take the same path to achieve the same thing?

Baba Ramdev is about to do it. I don't know what for, though. You see, I think this is a very cheap way of getting things done. But, ah well, government will rather do its best to save your life than to activate its spinal cord.

Katrina Kaif will have a fast to bring "Best Item Number" award into Filmfare and National Awards. She has been barking at many trees now, and may take the extreme step.

Captain Vijaykanth may fast until TV channels play all his movies and the audience watches all those movies.

Sachin fans will fast, you know, because they believe they can do anything. Maybe also to get him an award or two.

Dada fans will fast, because he won't be on an IPL team.

Sonia Gandhi will go on a fast till every single Indian calls her an Indian. Of course, her speech will be in English, and she will break her fast at Pizza Hut.

Indian CM will put the ex-CM in a mandatory fast. Just for rivalry's sake. And parts of TN will burn, schools and colleges will earn holidays. Noting new. Happens, just a new way now.

Kareena Kapoor will go on fast, because Katrina would've become a competitor to her size-0 figure after her fast. So, Kareena's goal will be to get producers to make films for size "-1" figure girls.

Chief Justice of India will fast so that people listen to him rather than the ones who fast. Err, I mean, all others who fast.

Himesh Reshamiyya will fast so that people will listen to him when he speaks during the fast. Note, this fast may be longer than usual, since some people may want the fast to change his voice. And attitude. And cap. And his weight. And......

Sreesanth will fast and try to make the selectors select him for every series, every match, every finals.

National security advisor will fast to make fast an illegal and punishable act.

DD National soap actors will fast to get more TRP for their channel.

Random reality show cast will fast to get the govt allow their reality show be shown on prime time television.

Random reality show's discarded contestant will call a fast to earn a wildcard entry into the game show's finale.

Arindham Choudhary will fast to get accreditation to his dreamy-land institute. He will dream beyond NITs,IIMs, IITs, IISCs, LKGs, Nurserys, IIPMs... if not attended to, he might dare to dream beyond moons and stars.

Lalu Yadav will fast, just to prove that anyone can do that.

A Raja and Kanimozhi will fast to remove the number "2" and letter "G" from the alpha-numeric system.


Someone will fast to end the brainless-ly stupid "Art of fasting" for gain of something which he/she couldn't achieve by means of negotiations, argument, proposal or declaration. And our beautiful govt caves into it all the time.

Fast unto "death"??? Really?


  1. superb! loved it...especially the "Arindham Choudhary" part!

  2. OMG. this certain someone is going on a 1-day-fast to turn the govn's attention towards hockey woes!

  3. there you go!

  4. Eeenteresting! Eeenteresting. This path is many people's favourite!

  5. LOL that was good. The govt. doesn't cave in; only acts like it does and then pulls the carpet from under the feet of the fasters :)

  6. Awesome post! 5 STARS for bringing out one of fastest growing maladies in our society in the lightest and wittiest of styles. Kudos!

  7. nice one dude.....but the problem is that the govt gives a damn about these peoples lives.....they should be free to fast to death if they probs.....however we have no obligation to listen to them......if they die while more bugging!

  8. it is like one fly dying and thousands coming to carry it away. If one dies, people go more crazy. Had govt turned their heads on many fast-ers, and (touchwood) people died, this may not have been such as easy tool...